I love her, I really do. But I’ve started proofreading her life choices like they’re freshman essays. And honestly? I’m one more “but they seemed nice!” away from wrapping her in bubble wrap and hiding her in the library.
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Then yesterday, she left her dorm room unlocked all day because “someone might need to borrow a charger.” A stranger could’ve walked in, taken her stuff, and she’d probably leave a note saying “Hope you enjoy the snacks!” college stories: my girlfriend is too naive!!!
“Babe, that’s a scam.” “But it says ‘congratulations’ and has a smiley face!” “So does my Venmo request for ‘emotional damages.’ Doesn’t mean it’s legit.” I love her, I really do
The kicker? Her roommate’s sketchy ex-boyfriend asked to “crash for a few days.” She said yes without asking a single question. I had to explain that “crashed” doesn’t just mean tired—it means living on your futon and eating your ramen. I’m one more “but they seemed nice